Sunday, March 6, 2016

My harsh destiny

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and this post, My harsh destiny
My harsh destiny
It is said that the choices that we make determine our destiny, but in my case I had no choice, because there are times when we are not allowed to choose, because our destiny comes the way it comes and we have to accept it as it is. In my case it has been a harsh destiny.

My harsh life destiny
The harsh destiny
Dear readers, this post is the continuation of our previous post, my farm life experience, where we were talking about, some of the disadvantages that we might encounter during our lives and our destiny. We believe that some of us would like to believe that we are born with a destiny to fulfil, and if it is so, then my destiny is not a bright one, because from the beginning of my life I have had a hard life and this has continued during my life, perhaps it will still continue until I die, but anyhow let us go back to my life story in the farm, whether it was my destiny or not.
As I have already mentioned above about my farm life when I was young, where I reckon and feel that it was really unfair to my personal self, and to those youths that had to live in the farm as I did, this fact of life I will continue to describe to you at length and in depth as I keep writing on, since the main point that I want to make here is to show you how I had to struggle and to suffer while I was living in the farm, and even later on in the future as we will see. In fact, for me life was going to be much harder than I thought, since that way of life which I had lived in the farm had left me so far backward, because of that isolation that existed in the farms I even lacked in local general knowledge, and also in communication skills including all those nice things that a person says and does, which would make that same person attractive to the rest of the community.
Here I have also to say that this early disadvantaged way of life has affected me greatly for the rest of my life, and although I have tried to improve myself during my life, I have never been able to catch up with the rest of the world completely. So that, I feel it within me even now, as if I will never be completely satisfied with myself, because I think that I could have been better off if I had a different and better way of life when I was young to start with.
But since what’s been done is done, and one cannot go back and do it in a different way, I am/was stuck with it. Therefore, I had to put up with my backward way of life; and I had to accept that the only possible way that was left for me to earn a living for the rest of my life, had to be that I had to do hard physical work, which I did in a way or another and this hard work has helped me to overcome some of my drawbacks. From this life experience one could say that we should always try to improve ourselves and work hard for it, even when it is hard for us to find an easy way of life, if we are able to keep this attitude and work hard during our lives, we would be able to overcome many issues that could otherwise run us down.
Now let us continue to tell my life story; anyhow, at the time when all this hard and boring life was happening to us, including all those young people which used to live and work in this town’s farms, doing this same work as I did it all seemed normal to us, because even our forebears before us did that, as they had all lived this same way for centuries before us.
As I was saying also my forbears used to live in this town that I was born, and in which I had to live my youth just like them. But, most of my youth and I mean the most important years of my young life, at the time when a youth would like to try to find out the meanings of life, which would help him to learn how to deal with his life in the future in the society that we happen to live in; all those years were spent to live in our family farm and not in the town itself, and this did put me in a disadvantaged position from the very start, as I have already mentioned before, all because everything in the world was changing too fast and farming the old way was on the way out.
Breaking away from my farm life
For about twelve years I lived this farm life; so, the only time that I had a real break from farming was when I was called to go in the army, which in Italy was/is a compulsory service to the country, which every able young male must serve when one turns twenty-one years old or soon after that. Then when the army released me I migrated to Australia, and I was then in my early twenties. I was young and not afraid to do hard work, since I had learned that in the farm that we needed to work hard to earn our living.
But let me say just a few words about this service in the Italian army of those times, being in the compulsory Italian army is a hard life for anybody, and everybody laments about everything especially about the discipline, as for myself I did not find it very hard like some complain it is, but at the same time it was, because you do what you are told to do, at the same time you learn something new because you are exposed to a different way of living. But the hardest part of it all is that the compulsory army of those times, they didn’t pay us, we only got free food free clothes and just enough money to by some cigarettes if one was a smoker. Anyhow it is good to be in the army and learn a new way of life, it makes you feel better when that is over and done with.     
But, let me go back to tell you about my life in the farm and what it did to me. Because as I have already mentioned before, the farm life of those times was not what one would prescribe for a young man like me, if one wanted me as a young man to develop my potential properly, so that, I could be ready to meet the challenge of life when I would be older, in all sorts of communities not just farming a small farm.
But you see, as we have already mentioned, at the time when all this happened to me, no one could have ever thought of the forth coming changing world, and of the difficulties that I and some of the other boys that shared the same fate as me would have to face in later life. Just because the way of life happened to change so much and so fast since we were young.
Now, in order to understand how unfair it was for me and for those youths of my time who ended up in the farms like myself, I have to convey to you the different set up of this town of Genzano; the way that people separate each other in classes, not because they like to be different to each other, but because they are different, and therefore they think and talk in different ways, so they group themselves with their equal, because they feel more at ease that way: But in reality they are somehow all equal, as all the groups need each other soon or later.
There are reasons to believe that this way of life would usually happen everywhere else in the world in small towns, where there are two main groups of people in every community: There are those who live directly from the land, which are called the rural community, and those who work in town in all sorts of jobs, which would be called just town’s people and they include; shop keepers, doctors, vets,  craftsmen, clerks, schools and school teachers, priests, policemen, (carabinieri which are Italian policemen), guardians, and every other sort of jobs that one can think of, in order to run a town properly; and then all the rest of the population, like whole families and women and children, so that a town would be self-reliant.
Anyhow at a certain stage of my life I started to become aware that I had to break away from this type of farm living, because a lot of things were changing and we didn’t earn enough from the small farm that we had, so it was time for us young would be farmers to change also, but let me say a bit more about my farm life views and the town I have come from, so that it would be better for my readers to understand what was going on at those times. After all those times will not come back any-more, and it would be good to have at least a sort of record, in order to remember how those times were.
So in my next article, let me talk about my farm life views, followed by several other articles about my farm life, and then talk about the town of Genzano and its communities, to explain better how those times were, in the fifties and earlier.  

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